Leadership buy-in starts with better conversations.
- Renate Matroos
- Jul 17
- 4 min read
Updated: Jul 18
If you’re a Human Resources or Learning & Development professional, you probably recognize the following scenario. You’ve been asked to solve a problem:
“Our middle management needs more development. Can you put something together?”
Of course you can, and you get straight to work. You map out ideas for a 6 to 8-week program: practical topics, expert speakers, maybe a mix of group sessions and 1:1s, and a hybrid model of in-person gatherings with online sessions. You have a plan and you know it will help these managers.
Next step? You talk to managers to understand what they need. You send invites for a few quick calls to find out that everyone is too busy to chat. Meetings get rescheduled or canceled and then, radio silence.
You wonder, if these managers can’t even talk for 30 minutes to help you design this, how will they ever show up for six to eight weeks of sessions?
You’re not alone
This is a challenge any HR or L&D professional I’ve spoken to runs into. You’re tasked with solving a challenge, you design a solution, and then you run straight into a wall. You can’t get people to care enough to show up, share their input or champion the idea with their peers.
And you know what’s even more surprising? Leaders face the exact same challenge as you do. A senior leader is rolling out a new strategy or a middle manager is introducing a new way of working, and they hit the same wall.
We often think that buy-in is only an HR or L&D headache, but every leader, at every level, is trying to move people from “sounds good” to “I’m in, let’s do this”.
Why does it fall apart?
Buy-in isn’t just budget and time approval; real buy-in means:
People understand what you’re asking them to commit to
Why it matters to the business and to them
They believe that the idea is realistic and worth their time
They feel a sense of ownership: it’s not just your idea, it’s theirs too!
But why is it so hard to get this?
Most people don’t struggle with the ideas, but with the conversations. We skip straight to presenting the solution we’ve already made and didn’t even check if it solves the right problem. We don’t ask what else is on their plate and competing for attention.
When we reach out, we're not even clear about what we actually need. Is it input, a green light or just someone to back us up?
And then we’re surprised (or hurt) when we're hit back with: “I’m too busy right now, can we reschedule?”
How do I get better buy-in? Start with better conversations.
Better buy-in always starts with a better conversation, regardless of whether you’re an HR or L&D professional rolling out your own initiative or a manager leading a big change.
Make it relevant
What’s the bigger goal or pressure they’re dealing with right now? What keeps them up at night?*
What’s a big priority or challenge they’re focused on right now?
What result do they need to deliver this quarter or this year?
How does what you’re working on help them solve that issue?
Why would they care today, and not someday?
*E.g., Are they under pressure to retain more managers? Do they need to grow sales by 20%? Are they worried about keeping top talent from leaving? Are they trying to lead through major change?
If you can’t answer these questions, find those answers before sending them an invite.
Be clear and specific.
When you reach out, make sure you tell them:
What you want exactly: 15 minutes or 30 minutes? Input on what?
Why you’re asking them specifically.
What’s in it for them: what will they get by giving you their time?
Listen first
During the conversation, you will:
Just ask and listen, you won’t pitch anything yet (I repeat: do not pitch anything yet!),
Get curious about what’s really going on: What’s the real challenge here? What’s making it hard? What happens if nothing changes?,
Take notes, especially the language they use. That’s the same language you’ll use when you pitch the final plan.
Just do it
If you promise to share next steps, do it.
If they say “keep me updated”, do it.
If you say “I’ll follow up in two weeks”, do it.
These might seem like small things, but consistency builds trust and trust builds buy-in.
Connect the dots
After the conversation, map what you’ve heard to what you’re designing:
Does this solve the problem they described?
How will you measure success?
Who else do you need to speak to or involve to make this real?
Bonus tip:
Next time you’re stuck, ask your leader: “When you roll out a new idea, how do you get your team to say yes?” or “How do you get buy-in when you’re launching something new?”
Their answer might unlock your next move, and it’s also a reminder to them that you’re in the same boat: both trying to make things better for people who are already extremely busy.
At the end of the day, buy-in doesn’t come from fancy slides or perfect plans. It comes from the real conversations, the genuine chats, the thoughtful questions, and the way you follow up that makes the difference.
Start here and watch what happens next!
Feel free to send me an email at renate@twenty6consultancy.com or drop me a line on LinkedIn if you have any questions!
